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FOR FUN: The Perfect Wife

Saturday, February 1, 2014

NO ONE IS PERFECT

...but for guys who want a PERFECT WOMAN (Complete package)... HERE:

This guy (Joe) had only been married for two weeks, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out into town and party with his old buddies, so he says to his new wife (Carol),

"Honey, I'll be right back"

"Where are you going coochy cooh, ?" asked the wife.

"I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I'm going to have a beer."

The wife says to him,

"You want a beer my love?"

Then she opens the door to the refrigerator and shows him 25 different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, his favorite Guinness etc.

Joe doesn't know what to do, and the only thing that he can think of saying is,

"Yes, loolie loolie, but the bar, you know, the frozen glass"

He didn't get to finish the sentence, when the wife interrupts him by saying,

"You want a frozen glass puppy face?"

She takes a huge beer mug out of the freezer so frozen that she was getting chills holding it.

Joe, looking a bit pale, says,

"Yes, tootsie roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious, I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise OK?

"You want hors d'oeuvres poochi pooh?"

She opens the oven and takes out 15 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in a blanket, mushroom caps, pork strips, etc.

"But sweet honey, at the bar, you know, the swearing, the dirty words and all that,"

"You want dirty words cutie pie?,"

"HERE, DRINK YOUR F*CKING BEER IN YOUR FROZEN F*CKING MUG AND EAT YOUR F*CKING SNACKS, BECAUSE YOU AREN'T GOING ANYWHERE! GOT IT A*SHOLE?!!"


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